Finding the Sonic New
If you play music, you probably remember the first time you hit that chord, or made that noise, forcing you to keep doing it, just to see if you could feel that again. I like hearing new music that reminds me of that... when you can tell they're exploring to find that feeling again. It's like being a kid, again.
I wish I had time to do that. It takes being in a certain frame of mind to inspire that kind of exploration. Too many errands and other jobs around the house zap the desire. Sometimes, just flipping on the TV and letting it drone on hypnotizes the will away.
Scheduling the time to find it robs and flushes away the spontaneity required to find that new thing you need. Sitting there, the same old patterns stolen from stale muscle memory are all that find their way to fingertips. The clock keeps grabbing hurried eyeballs. Nothing good comes of it.
Comfortable hopelessness overwhelms. When dreams are possible, they'll pull hope from that old bog. Comfort unmercifully guts dreams.
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