Thursday, May 12, 2005

Rock n Roll Whoredom

Being a musician is being a whore. You take your most deeply held feelings, and give them out for everyone to molest. You give your innermost to everyone, hoping that someone will love you back, or at least help you pay your bills. Sometimes they give it to you up the cornhole, other times they show you love, then leave as soon as your entertainment value is gone.

I don't really know if I want to be a musician. I like to write my songs, a lot of times for theraputic reasons. I never think about how someone will react to it. Then, when I play it for someone, I'm constantly feeling their judgement of me. It really is like they are getting to analyze my psyche. I know it's not fair, but I try to see in their eyes who I am.

I've decided I'm not going to be a music whore. I'll do what I do for me, and if someone likes it, then they can like it. If they don't, that just means they aren't like me, and don't feel like I feel. I'm cool with that.