Thursday, January 03, 2008

Letter from Neo-Cons to Ron Paul Supporters

Dear Ron Paul Supporters,

I hate you. I hate you Ron Paul people for your common sense. I hate you for realizing neoconservatives are no better than the Democrats. We steal from you, we lie to you, we spy on you, we violate your privacy, we violate your dignity, we insult your intelligence... but it's none of your business, because you're not supposed to know about it!

Why don't you people just go back to sleep, and forget you ever heard anything bad about us? Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain. Let us continue to take over the world at our whim. Let us do what we need to do to make sure you're "safe", even though what we do puts you at more risk than if we had just minded our own business. You people don't need to know what kind of bottom line us neo-conservatives keep. You people think too much. If we want to make billions (or trillions) off of an unjust war, that's OUR business!

I hate the way you people call us out for trying to drive wedges between Americans. I hate how you Paulites react to our criticism by becoming stronger. I hate how you are so concerned with the truth, virtue, principle, and the Constitution. Don't you people realize how OLD that thing is? We're NEO-cons... that means NEW-cons. We don't have time for your history lessons or to read your old documents. We work around those things... that's why we try to play you against one another. Don't you get it?

I hate the way you insist we have sound money. If we had sound money, how could us neo-cons manipulate the currency to become insanely rich? And quit telling us how we'll have to pay for all that money we borrow. We print it, so all we have to do is make more. Is that so hard to understand?

You Ron Paul people have got too much walking around sense. We need to knock you guys down a peg or two. You think we're taking away your freedoms now? Just wait and see what happens if one of us gets the nomination...

With conceited condescension,
The Neo-Cons