Wednesday, August 09, 2006

More School Daze

I was standing in the line, after having my courses scheduled by an advisor. I looked at the line, looked at my bulging schedule, and then looked at the door. I bolted. I needed some time to think.

I went and got some lunch.

In order to complete my Bachelor's by spring, I'd need to take an ungodly amount of hours this semester, and some other distance courses via the internet and extension campuses, as well. I don't want to get in over my head. I was almost over my head last semester, and all my classes were at the Selma campus. I was really tortured last semester. This summer off has made me start to wonder if that piece of paper is worth it.

My regular advisor is on sabbatical in Africa. He had all my transfer stuff, and my schedule worked out. I felt awkward and indecisive, today. To top it off, my advisor, who will be one of my instructors this fall, was in high school with me! She's my age. She has her Masters, and teaching isn't her regular job.

I want to learn. I want to accomplish what I quit 12 years ago. I'm just afraid I'm not really learning, but cramming info into my mind so that I can pass a class. I think the things I REALLY learned, I did so independently.

I'm gonna be taking a full course load this semester. I feel like I'd be giving up if I didn't. I'm not a quitter. I'll be going back up to the school when I finish my lunch. Maybe the line will be shorter by then.